Indian Samourai इंडियन सामुराई

Dans un article récent (Article_TOI_Why Hinglish will beat Chinglish_310808.pdf,) une journaliste, qui simplifiait un peu en faisant de tous les Indiens les héritiers du sanscrit mais passons, expliquait pourquoi l’Inde ne se ferait pas voler par la Chine son titre incontesté de leader mondial des call centers (trop bien!).

Et c’est parce que les Indiens parlent mieux anglais que les Chinois. Et c’est quand même bien vrai. Même si ils se sont approprié l’anglais à leur manière (voir notamment a l’Hinglish, simple mixte anglais-hindi (bien pratique pour comprendre les Bollywoods)). Beaucoup d’Indiens ne parlent pas un anglais de qualité parce qu’ils traduisent instinctivement leurs phrases en Anglais, ce qui est souvent rigolo. Comme lorsque je traduis littéralement des expressions françaises pour Shiv, du genre « you give me the hand, I want the arm »…

 

Mais il paraît que c’est encore plus rigolo en Chinois ! Voilà par exemple des panneaux que l’on peut trouver en Chine, devant les toilettes :

- Go Into the Toilet Beard Know

- The service object of this toilet is limited by a person only.

- The toilet provides only into the toilet place, the dissatisfied foot goes into the toilet to have a bowel movement outside of other request.

- The one who go into toilet want to take good care of toilet facilities, strictlying forbid to move this toilet tool to did it touse.

- Go into the toilet beard to place excrement the tool is intestablishment inside, cannot spread to leak.

- The one who go into toilet cannot clamour loudly. The in order to prevent make other go into toilet is frighten.

- Go into toilet and cannot will boil to make food to take isedible into this toilet, the in order to prevent break good go into toilenvironment.

- Can not move bowels in the urine the pond.

- Please read this beard to know hard into the toilet and act according to carry on.

 

Et voici d’autres exemples, du site engrish.com.

- Sign at a counter of China Eastern Airlines. Check in animals and alcoholics, passengers may carry 2 bottles wine.

- Sign in a garden. Little grass is having rest, don’t disturb them.

- Sign in a garage. If you are stolen, call the police at once.

- Sign at a river. Take the child, fall into water carefully.

- Space for rent: Please inform office if you are interesting.

- Sign at a cliff. Be careful the safe. No jumping.

- Sign at river. Take care to fall into water.

- Sign at a clothes shop. Kids swear.

- Sign on a wall. Dying right here is strictly prohibited.

- Sign in East China Hotel, regarding stoppage of water in taps. We are awfully sorry for the convenience to you. Thank you for your uncooperation.

- Sign at cliff: Care for life, do not fun.

- Sign near a low roof. Bump the head care sully

- Sign at a railway platform. Please don’t cross any railings lest suddenness happens.

- Sign at an airport. Pregnant woman over 70 and disabled people lounge.

- Sign at a hotel. Please present your voucher before breakfart.

 

Some signboards have inadvertent sexual connotations:

- Poster for body cream: Whitening peeling cream, removes horniness.

- Sign at a pond. Please do not feed the fish with your privates.

- Poster outside a shop. Pleasanty surprise of groping.

- Sign in a store. May your satisfaction sincerely aroused by me.

- Piano teaching manual. Piano Teachers’ Intercourse Book.

- Sign at a park. No kicking of balls.

- Sign in a store. Please don’t touch yourself. Let us help you try out.

- Sign in a department store. Rear-service Department.

NB : L’anglais est arrivé en Inde au début des années 1600, avec la Compagnie des Indes et aurait dû en partir en 1947 – les Anglais ayant en effet exigé que les Indiens « désapprennent » l’anglais (ah l’humour britannique). Aujourd’hui, l’anglais est une « associate official language », une langue officielle associée, même si il est moins important que l’hindi. L’objectif affiché est qu'il soit remplacé par le seul hindi comme langue de communication interne mais cela pose problème dans les Etats du Sud où la pénétration de l'hindi est très faible et par ailleurs l’intégration à l’économie mondiale rend cet objectif impossible. L’Inde compterait 350 millions d’anglophones (les chiffres varient complètement de 10 à 35% mais à ma petite échelle d’expatriée, ça suffit très bien). L’anglais s’est développé à sa manière, s’agrémentant de mots hindi (ce qui donne le « hinglish »), conservant des formules désuètes etc., un peu comme le Français au Québec en somme. On trouve même des dictionnaires d’Indian English…

Et voilà comment l’autre jour, tandis que je demandais à mon tailleur de me faire la réplique d’une robe, je me suis entendue lui dire: “I want the EXACT SAME”. Et là, j’ai flippé ! Et puis finalement, c’est normal de choper les tournures de langue du pays, non ??

Voici donc quelques exemples d’expressions et de formules de grammaire anglaise version indianisée, qui m’ont bien fait marrer (à chaque fois je reconnais mon collègue !) et également surprise – quelques tournures incorrectes que je croyais bonnes !

Vous savez que vous avez passé trop de temps en Inde quand par exemple vous dites (le détail et la mise en page dans le fichier:Indian English.pdf) : 

ILS DISENT / THEY SAY à AU LIEU DE / INSTEAD OF

I am liking it very much. I am understanding it. She is knowing the answer. à I like it very much.

Let us discuss about this. à Let us discuss this.

They did it, no? / He is here, isn’t it? / She closed the door, did she? à They did it, didn’t they? / He is here, isn’t he? / She closed the door, didn’t she?

A: You didn't come on the bus? B: Yes, I didn't." à A: You didn't come on the bus? B: No, I didn't."

My all closets are empty. à My closets are all empty.

He does this always. à He always does this.

Where you are going? / Tell me where are you going. à Where are you going? / Tell me where you are going.

I only told her to do that. à I Ø told her to do that.

She had so much of work to do that… à She had so much Ø work to do that…

Let’s go out for some ice-cream-ice-cream. / She has curly-curly hair. / You will get used to the humidity slowly-slowly. / Don't worry about small-small things. à Let us go out for some ice-cream Ø.

Seriously / Actually etc., she is a good person. à Ø she is a good person.

What is your good name? à What is your Ø name?

Please do the needful. à Could you help me with this?

Where do you stay?à Where do you live?

I don't take meat/milk. à I don't eat meat / drink milk.

It is really bad. / There is none. à It is worst. / There is less.

Out of station.à Out of town.

Tell me (used when answering the phone) à How can I help you?

T-K. ("theek hai" literally means "fine is") à O-K.

Hotel à Restaurant

Kindly disregard the previous message. à Please disregard the previous message.

My head is paining. –> My head is hurting.

Cover à Envelope ou shopping bag

I got fired today at the office. à I have been given an oral (not written) dressing down by a superior / sacked / dismissed.

To revert à To reply to

Today morning / Yesterday night –> This morning / Last night

Healthy à Fat people

To reduce à To lose weight

Bring it this side. / We went that side. à Bring it here. / We went there.

Metro (for Metropolis) à Big city

When are you shifting? à When are you moving?

Do you have sugar? à Do you have diabetes?

I have BP! à I am suffering from high BP or hypertension.

I met my friend last night. à I spent time with my friend last night.

I also need a blanket. / He was late also. à I too need a blanket. / He was late as well.

Open / Close the air conditioner. à Turn on / Turn off the air conditioner.

Open your shirt. à Take off your shirt.

Current went and came. à The power went out and came back.

You are gifting me a new cell phone? à You are giving me a new cell phone?

Curd à Yoghurt

Batchmate or batch-mate à Not classmate, but a schoolmate of the same grade

Eggitarian à A person who is eats vegetarian food, milk and eggs but not meat

Brother / Sister à Male brother & first cousin / Female sister & first cousin

Deadly à Intense

Hi-fi à Stylish or beyond the perception of the average person

Sexy à Excellent or extremely cool

Gone for a toss. à Something got ruined.

Bucks à Rupees

I had gone. à I went.

I would be going to New York this weekend. à I will be going to New York this weekend.

I have been working since four years. à I have been working for four years ou I have been working since four years ago.

Can you drop me? à Can you drop me off?

Throw it. à Throw it out.

Wish her. à Wish her a happy birthday.

Let's go to city. à Let's go to the city.

I heard that you have written a document on... Could you send me the same? à I heard that you have written a document on... Could you send it to me?

What I did? à What did I do?

I met him five years back. à I met him five years ago.

Arey! C'mon, yaar! Don't be such a killjoy! / Long time no see, bhai. / Ay, bhaiyya! Over here! / How much to go to the train station, boss? /Arey! What a good job you did!, Accha, so that's your plan. 

Pour ce qui est de l’accent, l’accent indien surprend toujours mais au final il est assez proche de l’accent français : inutile donc de vouloir se la raconter avec un accent britannique !

Sources: chillibreeze.com par Dr. Roopa Nishi Vishwanathan et Wikipédia, article de John Lawler.